


A Lie That Tells The Truth

by artsyspikedhair



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Eating Disorders, Gender Dysphoria, M/M, Photographs, Photography, Second War with Voldemort, Trans Character, Trans Female Character, Trans Male Character, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-04
Updated: 2015-09-04
Packaged: 2018-04-19 01:32:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,336
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4727726
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/artsyspikedhair/pseuds/artsyspikedhair
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Colin had never had a good memory. He carried a camera around so he wouldn't miss a thing.  Or: Colin Creevey and The Camera He Carried.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Lie That Tells The Truth

**Author's Note:**

> The title is based off of a quote from a book about a boy who takes pictures called I am J, by Cris Beam. The full quote is "Art is a lie that tells the truth. I am a lie that tells the truth."  
> Also this is based off of this tumblr post: http://livesandliesofwizards.tumblr.com/post/62034020907/colin-takes-pictures-he-takes-pictures-of 
> 
> though that's mostly in that it is about Colin and made me think of his life more.

He was five years old when he figured out what he wanted his name to be. He never liked the name he was given, never liked how it made his father cry to hear it once his mom was gone. He never liked being a Junior, but that was what his father called him after the accident. He knew he wanted his name to start with a C, because that was the letter Prince Charming's name started with and his mom always told him about Prince Charming. Prince Charming was strong and rode a horse, just like he wanted to. 

He was in the grocery store with his father and his brother Dennis, who was three and therefore allowed to sit in the seat of the shopping cart, when he heard the name. A mother was yelling at her kid about something (his memory was fuzzy even back then), and, clearly at the end of her rope, shouted "Colin! Get back here right now!" The mother and son walked out of the store. All of the thoughts he was thinking before, about sugary cereal and why his father delivered milk when they sold it right there, disappeared. He had a name now, one that met all of his requirements. He didn't get upset when his dad yelled at him to hurry up like he usually did, because nothing could upset him now. He had a name!

Colin told his father the next morning, after they had done the job of giving milk to all the thirsty people at 5:00 in the morning and were simply eating breakfast. Mr. Creevey asked him "Why?", knowing his kid always had interesting reasons for doing stuff.  
"Because it sounds like 'calling' and someone will be 'calling' me by my name, so it'll be funny!" Colin answered, knowing he shouldn't mention the Prince Charming thing. His father didn't like remembering his mother, it made him too sad.  
"Alright, Colin, finish your breakfast and get to bed before school starts in three hours."

Colin's life at school was fine. Nobody paid much attention to him before, and nobody did after. He realized he was a boy soon after he realized what his name should be, and the teachers were mainly focused on getting the troublesome kids to be quiet. They didn't care much about what bathroom someone used. Some of the other boys tried to beat him up in Year Five, but he took a picture of them while they were doing it and showed it to the principal, who gave the boys rude talking-to's. He took pictures of everything, determined never to forget a single moment of his life. His brother Dennis was his only friend, and sometimes when they were together strange things would happen. Strange things also happened when Colin was by himself, like when his Year Four teacher had taken his camera only for it to be in Colin's pocket the next morning. Colin assumed Dennis had stolen it for him, because Dennis often did stuff that got him in trouble. He swore he didn't do it, but Colin didn't believe him.

Colin's next big realization happened on a warm summer day. His father woke him up at 4:45, like always, and he and Dennis went to do the morning rounds with the milkman. Colin thought he was getting a little bit old to be helping carry milk jugs, but the thrill of breaking into a house when the owners weren't awake yet had never worn off. When they came back, there was an owl on the mail box. Mr. Creevey opened the mailbox and went inside the house. The boys followed, feeling like this might not be an ordinary day after all. Colin took a quick photo of the owl with his camera before heading in. "Colin! You got a letter!" Mr. Creevey exclaimed. Colin was really excited now. Nobody ever wrote him before. He ran up to his bedroom, took a picture of the address, took a picture of the back of the letter, opened it, took a picture of the ripped seal, and then finally opened the letter. He thought at first this was some sort of prank, but then he realized nobody knew his address. Besides, a prankster wouldn't have written _Mr. Colin Creevey _ __on the top. It was far too formal for a prank. He ran downstairs.__

The wizarding world was different from the world Colin had always known. He bought a wand, robes, wizarding textbooks, and a magic camera (taking pictures of everything with his handy Polaroid) before it really hit him. He was a wizard! His weirdness wasn't just from having no friends and carrying a camera around so he wouldn't have to explain himself to anyone. He learned how to use the wizard camera on the Hogwarts Express before he decided to read the newspaper. He didn't really understand the title, after all, Daily Prophet was never the type of name the other newspapers from back home had. He decided to read it anyway, and immediately fell in love with it. The text design was really confusing, so Colin had to think to read it. He also immediately fell in love with the boy he was reading about. He was everything Colin loved about masculinity. He was a survivor of an attack by an evil wizard, and even got a cool name from it, The-Boy-Who-Lived Colin also liked how uncomfortable he looked in the picture with Lockhart. It was exactly how Colin had felt for the first ten years of his life. He decided he was going to be less of a nervous wreck this time around. He was basically getting to do school all over again, as Colin Creevey. He was going to be a regular boy, a wizard. He was really excited by the time he got to the castle.

He hadn't gotten around to asking anyone about what would happen when he got to Hogwarts, because he had sat alone. The idea of Houses came as a shock to him, but the pretty blonde girl next to him said it didn't matter. Her name was Luna and she talked to him throughout the Sorting while he snapped pictures of her and the Hat, until McGonagall called him up. He asked the Sorting Hat what being in each house would mean. "I wasn't paying attention." he thought sheepishly.  
"Okay, Ravenclaw is definitely not for you. Ravenclaws value knowledge, Gryffindors value courage, Hufflepuffs value hard work, and Slytherins value ambition." the Sorting Hat replied quickly.  
"That's Harry Potter!" Colin thought. "I read about him in the newspaper. He's so cool. " Colin then realized the Hat could hear his thoughts.  
"You seem like a brave one." the Hat said mysteriously, before yelling out "GRYFFINDOR!"  


Colin was brought up to his dorm with the rest of his classmates. Most of the older kids were gossiping about Harry Potter and Ron Weasley, who had flown to school in a car! Colin was curious, and as he snapped pictures with his magic camera, listened in on the conversations. He wasn't paying much attention to the prefect until the words "boys' dormitory's that way." were spoken. Then a knot in his stomach formed. What if he wasn't seen as a boy? What if the other kids laughed at him, or his stuff wasn't there, or he didn't have a place to change? It was problems like these that made not having friends so easy back home, Colin thought. Back home he was never invited to sleepovers, so this never happened. He eventually tried the girls' stairs, which didn't let him up. Relieved yet scared, he went to the boys' first year dorm. Nothing was wrong. There was a bathroom in the dorm, the other boys seemed nice, and his trunk was where it belonged.

During breakfast Colin met a nice boy named Justin who explained the moving stairs to him and passed the syrup when he asked. Colin took pictures of the Great Hall, and tried shooting Harry from a distance. It didn't work, so after his first class he asked for a picture. He didn't mean to get Harry made fun of, he just really liked the older boy and wanted to remember him. Colin decided to be brave, and accused the blonde kid of being jealous of Harry. The boy denied it and Harry was then accompanied by Lockhart, the teacher Colin hadn't met yet but remembered from the article. He shot a picture and went to his next class

Colin's life at Hogwarts was incredible! His classes were all interesting (especially History of Magic and Potions), his roommates hadn't noticed his lack of a certain appendage, and best of all, Harry Potter would talk to him. Colin never liked his name more than when it came from Harry's mouth, accompanied by those green green eyes on his. Colin often fell asleep thinking of those eyes, and knew they would never escape his memory. He wasn't sure, however, and so when the Quidditch match ended with Harry on the ground, Colin took his picture, wondering why he suddenly had the urge to carry him up to Madame Pomfrey's just to make sure he wasn't in pain. 

Colin's luck didn't last forever though. He was Petrified halfway through first year, with most of his film wrecked in the process. Madame Pomfrey noticed Colin was female bodied when he was in the Hospital Wing and informed him she knew after she gave him the Mandrake Draught. Worse, over the summer he began changing, and soon was stuck with an awful amount of fat on his chest and his hips began widening. His brother either pretended not to notice or actually didn't notice, but Colin had to study hard to make up for the time he spent unconscious. Still, whenever he stood up, he felt like his skin was too tight. He hated what was happening, but his father didn't know how to stop it. "Ask your wizard friends." He helpfully suggested. But Colin was only still close with Luna and Justin, and neither of them knew he wasn't cisgender (he discovered that word in a book he found in the Muggle library). He also forgot to get their addresses, so he couldn't write them. He spent whatever time he could organizing his new and old pictures into scrapbooks. He held the signed photo of Harry's arm in special regard, and never let anyone else touch it. 

Second Year was hard for Colin. He talked to Madame Pomfrey about reversing pubescence, and found out she had no idea how to do it because it wasn't medical and nobody had ever needed this type of procedure before. Colin became less talkative, and more obsessed with taking pictures. He stopped eating, though the damage was done. He had breasts he hid with layers, and hip bones wider than they should have been and he can't let anything get bigger so he stopped eating dinner and grabbed apples he wouldn't actually eat for tea. He still loved talking to Harry, though it rarely occurred. Colin read the newspaper nightly, to avoid having to get out of his robes. He despised his new curves, and feared most what he knew would soon follow. He had no way of hiding blood with loose robes. 

Finally, he approached Snape after Potions. He didn't think Snape liked him, but he approved of Colin's skill in Potions, if not his enthusiasm. Colin stayed though it would soon be dinner, and asked if he could speak to Snape.  
"What would you like to discuss, Mr. Creevey?"  
"Well, er, you see..." Colin stalled.  
"Get on with it! You are making me late for supper." Snape said merciless towards the obviously scared child.  
"I don't have a penis!" Colin exclaimed, then inappropriately added "sir." Snape looked disgusted.  
"Why should I care?" he asked, his hunger and general attitude making this discussion far more painful for poor Colin than needed.  
"I was wondering if their were any potions that could reverse female puberty. Sir." Colin said, fighting hard to remain calm.  
"Oh." Snape was not expecting this, though he should have. "I assume Madame Pomfrey couldn't help you. Yes, there are potions that can reverse the affects of puberty. They are rather complex and painful, but since you are the most accomplished Gryffindor" he sneered as he said the house name, "I will give you the instructions." He went into his cupboard and got out a dusty book.  
"Thank you sir!" Colin's trademark excitement was back, now that he had a cure.  
"You are welcome." Snape replied, before adding "And once you are done, go to McGonagall for help." Colin nodded and ran to dinner, which he ate at the Ravenclaw table, listening happily to Luna talk on about the Threstrals. He was able to see them too, and often fed them extra apples. Still, he ate his dinner for the first time in a week, knowing he could afford to be healthy because there was a cure.

It took the rest of Second Year to collect the supplies for the potions while Colin's chest grew and grew while his waist shrunk. He considered chopping his chest off, but knew if he kept working on gathering ingredients, he could make it. He made the first potion during the summer, and was thrilled to wake up with his chest, while not nearly as flat as other boys', a size smaller. He finished the second potion just in time for school to start. His chest was entirely flat, and the potions didn't hurt like Snape had warned they would. He was also extremely excited that Dennis was starting, and that he talked to Harry on his first day back. He had realized over the summer that his feelings for Harry was called a crush, and had a number of daydreams that made him slightly happy he wasn't born with a penis, because then he couldn't be embarrassed by boners.

Colin finished the third and final potion around the time the Triwizard Tournament was getting people pissed at Harry. The third Potion hurt awfully, because it was changing bone structure. After he had drunk it, he couldn't fall asleep and so he stayed up trying to change the SUPPORT CEDRIC DIGGORY buttons. Colin worked hard for the rest of the year, and almost forgot about his body for the rest of the year. He wasn't one to notice his roommate voices dropping or hair spurting, though his camera captured it all. He was busy taking photos and doing homework, as well as hanging out with Ernie Macmillan, who was a lot nicer than he was first year. He also spent plenty of time with his brother, teaching him the rules of Quidditch and helping with homework that now seemed easy to him. Dennis had the most trouble with History so Colin gave him his notes. It felt good to be helpful.

Rita Skeeter approached Colin about Harry's love life. Colin didn't want to say anything. He didn't want to admit the tight feeling in his chest whenever he catches Harry and Hermione together, talking about whatever and laughing. He didn't want to think about the voice in his head that whispered about how he could have been Harry's date to the Yule Ball, if he had stayed Junior and faked being a girl. But Rita wanted answers and Colin wanted to be in the paper so he told her "Hermione's his girlfriend." and ignored the sinking feeling in his stomach as he said it.

The year went by uneventfully for Colin. He cheered for Harry at the Tournament and Quidditch games, taking pictures of the dragon and Lee Jordan. He did not get invited to the Yule Ball by anyone over Fourth year, but snuck in anyway and took photos of Harry and Ron alone, the couples dancing (he gleefully noticed Hermione with someone else), and some close ups of the band before McGonagall caught him and he was stuck doing detention for the rest of the month. It was worth it, he told Dennis as he put the photos in his thirteenth scrapbook. 

At the end of the year, the Creevey brothers' were in for a shock. Voldemort was back, and while their father had no idea what was happening, Colin pored over decade old newspapers from the first war, determined to know what he was up against. He spent the summer angry, practicing curses, yet also grateful, knowing he wasn't ever going to be seen as a young woman ever again. His summer visits to the doctor were previously full of "miss," and "the ladies' room's over there." He didn't like to think about it, but he knew when he died the gravestone would say Colin, regardless of what Muggle laws said his name was on paper. He was ready to fight Voldemort, because regardless of what Dennis said (which was "Harry's lying, the newspaper said so!"), Colin knew there would be war.

Fourth year Colin began taking photos for a different reason. He learned about Photojournalism during his library trips that summer, and he took photos for the newspapers. The underground Daily Prophet workers who promised to get him published failed, but Colin kept the photos for himself, putting them in a bright red scrapbook magically sealed shut for those without a password. He photographed the Decrees put on the walls, and the Weasley twins' exit, and Umbridge's face after he told her he believed Harry Potter saw Voldemort. He was given a dangerous detention with the bloodthirsty quill, and then a second one when he was caught photographing his wounds during detention instead of going on writing. Colin noticed people treating him different because of who he was, but that didn't matter. He photographed their sneering faces, just like he had back in Year Five. The only time he put down his camera was when he went to Dumbledore's Army meetings, having sneaked in his brother to Hogsmeade as well the first meeting. Dennis had changed his mind after seeing Harry and remembering the previous year's last supper.

Colin's life changed little after the D.A. was caught. He took more and more photos, talking less and less to his roommates who disapproved of him for being a Muggleborn, and nothing changed until the day one of them walked in on him in the shower. Then he got kicked out of his room, and no amount of talking to teachers could help him. He slept in the Room of Requirement and noticed, after a while, Luna slept there as well. He asked her why, and found he wasn't the only kid at Hogwarts who was transgender. Luna hadn't gone through male puberty, having used Muggle treatments to save her, which Colin found amusing and ironic. His fifth year was a lot like his fourth, only he didn't resist anymore when they pulled him out of school. He read a lot of books and stayed quiet.

Then Neville called Dumbledore's Army back to fight. Harry came back. Colin knew Harry was going to die, but he didn't believe it and so he put his camera in his pocket and escaped from the Gryffindor tower and fought with all his might. He killed two Death Eaters before being Avada Kedavra'd by Adolphus. He was small in death, as Neville and Oliver carried him to the Great Hall.

Mr. Creevey died soon after Colin, through a heart attack. Dennis was sent to live with an uncle in America. He went to school there, a wizarding school. He was shocked by his father's death but not Colin's. After he grew up he made sure Colin's photos lived on, first as evidence in the trial against Umbridge and later as a permanent exhibit in the Wizards' and Witches' Museum of Art. Dennis showed his kids the photos when he was older, telling them everything he knew about his brother.


End file.
